grief...

I'M READY TO SHAKE THIS...

All I really know to do is pray and write.  I am walking through some sad times right now.  I know lots of you out there are struggling just the same...it is tough.  One minute you are great and the next you feel like your heart is going to rip out of your chest because you just want one more time. 

I believe in heaven and hell.  I believe in angels.  I believe in demons, too.  I think that when you are suffering, Satan sees it as an open door to your vulnerability...

The only way I can explain it...this has totally blown my sense of security.  I cannot let myself feel this during the day because it really upsets Chloe Jo.  So, at night when things are quiet, it all sets in...and just overcomes me.  

People usually do not share about their grief...because it really isn't pleasant conversation.  I know that every person grieves differently.  I just wonder if this is normal? 

So, knowing that nothing scary like this comes from God...I have decided that I must be facing some demons who are crippling me with fear at night.  I have never been afraid.  But I am standing firm that God is bigger than this whole thing of grief...and HE will see me through this.

Sorry to be so deep this evening.  I continue to be a work in progress...once again I find myself needing to just let go...it isn't like I need to say goodbye, really...because I will see them again:) 

Whenever I am afraid, I will trust in You.   Psalm 56:3
Do not fear or be discouraged.  Deuteronomy 1:21
Evening and morning and at noon I will pray, and cry aloud, and He shall hear my voice.  Psalm  55:17